I am a wife, mother, grandmother, daughter, sister and friend. That alone is enough to make my life complicated but in June 2015 my life was turned inside out. I started experiencing burning, tingling, numbing, and deep stabbing pain. It started in my hands, then my feet and has traveled all over this poor 51 year old body. I have seen a dozen doctors and have been pricked, prodded and tested. All tests are negative. They can find nothing wrong with me. In the meantime, I am exhausted every moment of the day and have lost a lot of strength. BUT GOD… BUT GOD.. In the midst of a really bad spell several months ago, I cried out to Jesus saying, “Lord!!! Why? Why are You allowing this to continue? Please heal me! What possible use to You can I be when all I can do is cry?” He responded swiftly and strongly saying I am His tool and I will continue to be His tool. From that moment on, no matter how I have felt physically, my Jesus has lifted me up. My focus needs to be on Him and not my symptoms. Don’t get me wrong here…. It ain’t easy! I have periodic bouts of blindness and dizziness that leave me in bed. The pain seems as big as Mt Everest and as insurmountable. BUT GOD….. He is faithful. He has showed me how to focus on Him, beyond the pain. I literally wrap up in a soft fleece blanket in a darkened room and begin with praising Him and move into prayers for my loved ones and to more praise. Acts 27:14-44 describes Paul’s journey on a ship through a storm. Paul and 276 men were exceedingly tempest-tossed and feared death. Paul encouraged his shipmates who wanted to escape from the ship to STAY. In Verse 31 Paul says, “Unless these men stay in the ship, you cannot be saved.” That dear friends is my mantra! I will stay in the ship! I will stay lashed to the mast of the ship! Jesus is my mast. He is my strength. I will be rooted in Him. I will remain lashed to the mast, regardless to the storm. The storm will lie to me and say that I cannot survive, but my God is ever faithful. Lord Jesus, today, at this moment, I will focus on You and not this present storm. I will continue to hug that mast, with all my strength, eyes closed and praising You.
Julie Fisher is a wife, mama and grandmama. She works with her husband of many years in their home business. She is a frequent contributor to Ol’ Mama Squirrel being featured ever Wednesday in LEARNING TO LOVE with Julie Fisher. Julie is continually learning the secrets to fellowship, contentment, and worship through some very deep and difficult trials. God has seen fit to allow many and varied circumstances into her life, which has been trying her faith.
I dare say, she is shining like gold.